Listening to Rush

Listening to Rush


"Son, you seem to have a lot on your mind lately. Why not hop up on Daddy's knee and clear your mind.
"Okay Daddy."
"What's bothering you?"
It was just something my teacher said. "Daddy? Why did we attack Iraq?"
" Because the president lied and said that Saddam Hussein was developing weapons of mass destruction."
"That's what my teacher says. But I don't know. How do you two know that the president lied?
"Well, we haven't found any weapons."
"We haven't found Saddam Hussein yet either. Does that mean that he never existed?"
"Don't be a smart Alec."
" No really Daddy. Didn't Saddam Hussein admit that he had weapons of mass destruction back in 1991?"
" Yes he did."
"And didn't Saddam Hussein obstruct United Nations weapons inspectors so that they could not destroy his weapons?"
"Yes, that's true enough. But what does that have to do with anything?
"And didn't the inspectors confirm that he had tons of chemical and biological weapons that needed to be destroyed?
"Yes."
"So, are you telling me that Saddam Hussein kicked the inspectors out in 1997 so that he could destroy his weapons and dismantle his weapons development program in secret?"
"Now you are getting rude."
"Sorry Daddy. I'm just having trouble understanding how people can believe that Saddam Hussein did not have weapons of mass destruction. After all, the president did tell us that we could wait no longer before attacking because, "In the judgment of my military advisers, a swift response would provide the most surprise and the least opportunity for Saddam to prepare."
"You'd expect George Bush to say something like that."
"But, actually, it was Bill Clinton who said that, back in 1998."
"Do you want to get spanked?"
"No Daddy. I'm just trying to get a little wiser. Besides, British Prime Minister Tony Blair agreed with the president when he said. "We are delivering a powerful message to Saddam: If you act recklessly, you will pay a heavy price." Isn't Tony Blair a liberal too, or does liberal mean something different in other countries?
"Tony Blair is a liberal, but he was misled by George Bush, just like all the rest of us."
"But, Tony Blair said that in 1998, when Bill Clinton was still president. Why would Tony Blair be listening to the Governor of Texas?"
"Honey! Where's my paddle?"
"No Daddy! Please help me. Where did America go wrong? My teacher says that the United States is an evil, imperialist nation. I don't want to believe that."
"Well, we should have paid more attention to the international community. This wasn't like the first George Bush. He put together a real coalition to fight the first Gulf War. That gave us international legitimacy. This George Bush is a unilateral cowboy."
"But, I see where the Secretary of Defense said that: 'This is a real coalition. 'These are countries who are pledging their assistance and material support, and we are very happy to receive it.' Doesn't that give us legitimacy?"
"Oh Pooh! That Donald Rumsfeld will say anything to get us into a war."
"But that wasn't Donald Rumsfeld. It was Bill Clinton's Defense Secretary, William Cohen, who said that."
"My patience is wearing very thin, little man."
"Didn't you believe it when the Secretary of State said that, 'We must be prepared to act, and I am very grateful that others are prepared to stand with America. Our aim is to limit, to reduce substantially, Saddam's ability to produce biological, chemical and nuclear weapons.' The secretary also said that we didn't need the approval of the United Nations or anyone else to act in our own self-defense."
"I have a feeling that you're not talking about Colin Powell."
"No, that was Madeline Albright."
"Yes, I was beginning to see a pattern. Now it's my turn to ask a question. Where did you learn all this stuff?"
"Listening to Rush Limbaugh with Mommy."
"Aargh!!!!!!!!"