God Smites North Korea

The reason that North Korea lost to the US in women's soccer is because their players were struck by lightning.

"When we stayed in Pyongyang during training our players were hit by lightning, and more than five of them were hospitalised," said coach Kim.

"Some stayed in hospital and then came to Germany later than the rest of us. The goalkeeper and the four defenders were most affected, and some midfielders as well. The physicians said the players were not capable of participating in the tournament.

"But World Cup football is the most important and significant event for a footballer, so they don't want to think about anything but football.

"The fact that they played could be called abnormal, the result of very strong will."

Well, last year, the reason that the North Koreans got the asses kicked in the World Cup was because the coach didn't listen closely enough to Dear Leader.